The Alberta Cowboy...haha!!!
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 2,332
Likes: 3
From: Toronto,Ont Canada
The Alberta Cowboy...haha!!!
An Alberta cowboy was overseeing his
herd in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand new BMW advanced
out of a cloud of dust towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni
suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and
asks the cowboy "If I tell you how many cows and calves you have in your
herd, will you give me a calf?"
The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects to
his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet,
where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on
his location, which he then feeds to another NASA Satellite that scans the
area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital
photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in
Hamburg Germany. Within seconds, he retrieves an email on his Palm Pilot
that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a
MS-SQL database through an ODCB connected Excel spreadsheet with email on
his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he
prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his high-tech, miniaturized HP
LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly
1,586 cows and calves."
"That's right. Well I guess you can take one of my calves," says the cowboy.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on in amusement
as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what
your business is, will you give me back my calf?"
The young man thinks about it for a second, and then says, "Okay, why not?"
"You work for the Canadian Government," says the cowboy.
"Wow! That's correct," says the young man, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required," answered the cowboy. "You showed up here, even
though nobody called you; you want to get paid for giving me an answer I
already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much
smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows. This is a
herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog
herd in a remote mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand new BMW advanced
out of a cloud of dust towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni
suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and
asks the cowboy "If I tell you how many cows and calves you have in your
herd, will you give me a calf?"
The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his
peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"
The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects to
his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet,
where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on
his location, which he then feeds to another NASA Satellite that scans the
area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the digital
photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in
Hamburg Germany. Within seconds, he retrieves an email on his Palm Pilot
that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a
MS-SQL database through an ODCB connected Excel spreadsheet with email on
his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he
prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his high-tech, miniaturized HP
LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly
1,586 cows and calves."
"That's right. Well I guess you can take one of my calves," says the cowboy.
He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on in amusement
as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.
Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what
your business is, will you give me back my calf?"
The young man thinks about it for a second, and then says, "Okay, why not?"
"You work for the Canadian Government," says the cowboy.
"Wow! That's correct," says the young man, "but how did you guess that?"
"No guessing required," answered the cowboy. "You showed up here, even
though nobody called you; you want to get paid for giving me an answer I
already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much
smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows. This is a
herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog
ROFLMAO, excellent Bill, thanks for the chuckles.
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