Chuckle for the day
#211
Subject:MEDICAL WARNING - LOSS OF APPETITE.
A woman asks her husband,
'Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit and coffee?'
He declines.
'Thanks for asking, but I'm not hungry right now.
It's this Viagra,' he says.
'It's really taken the edge off my appetite.'
At lunchtime she asked him if he would like something . . . . .
'a bowl of soup, homemade muffins, or a cheese sandwich?'
He declines.
'The Viagra,' he says, 'really trashes my desire for food.'
Come dinnertime, she asks if he wants anything to eat.
'Would you like a juicy rib eye steak and scrumptious apple pie?
Or maybe a rotisserie chicken ..
He declines again . .. .
'No,' he says, 'it's got to be the Viagra.
I'm still not hungry.' . . . . .
'Well,' she says, 'Would you mind letting me up? I'm starving.'
A woman asks her husband,
'Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit and coffee?'
He declines.
'Thanks for asking, but I'm not hungry right now.
It's this Viagra,' he says.
'It's really taken the edge off my appetite.'
At lunchtime she asked him if he would like something . . . . .
'a bowl of soup, homemade muffins, or a cheese sandwich?'
He declines.
'The Viagra,' he says, 'really trashes my desire for food.'
Come dinnertime, she asks if he wants anything to eat.
'Would you like a juicy rib eye steak and scrumptious apple pie?
Or maybe a rotisserie chicken ..
He declines again . .. .
'No,' he says, 'it's got to be the Viagra.
I'm still not hungry.' . . . . .
'Well,' she says, 'Would you mind letting me up? I'm starving.'
#212
Registered User
iTrader: (13)
David was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the
children what their fathers did for a living.
All the typical answers came up - fireman, policeman, salesman, etc.
David was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked
him about his father. 'My father's an exotic dancer in a gay bar and
takes off all his clothes in front of other men.
Sometimes, if the offer's really good, he'll go out to the alley with
some guy and make love with him for money.'
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the
other children to work on some colouring, and took little David aside to
ask him, 'Is that really true about your father?'
'No,' said David, 'He plays for the Toronto Maple Leafs but I was
too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids.'
children what their fathers did for a living.
All the typical answers came up - fireman, policeman, salesman, etc.
David was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked
him about his father. 'My father's an exotic dancer in a gay bar and
takes off all his clothes in front of other men.
Sometimes, if the offer's really good, he'll go out to the alley with
some guy and make love with him for money.'
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the
other children to work on some colouring, and took little David aside to
ask him, 'Is that really true about your father?'
'No,' said David, 'He plays for the Toronto Maple Leafs but I was
too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids.'
#213
David was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the
children what their fathers did for a living.
All the typical answers came up - fireman, policeman, salesman, etc.
David was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked
him about his father. 'My father's an exotic dancer in a gay bar and
takes off all his clothes in front of other men.
Sometimes, if the offer's really good, he'll go out to the alley with
some guy and make love with him for money.'
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the
other children to work on some colouring, and took little David aside to
ask him, 'Is that really true about your father?'
'No,' said David, 'He plays for the Toronto Maple Leafs but I was
too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids.'
children what their fathers did for a living.
All the typical answers came up - fireman, policeman, salesman, etc.
David was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked
him about his father. 'My father's an exotic dancer in a gay bar and
takes off all his clothes in front of other men.
Sometimes, if the offer's really good, he'll go out to the alley with
some guy and make love with him for money.'
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the
other children to work on some colouring, and took little David aside to
ask him, 'Is that really true about your father?'
'No,' said David, 'He plays for the Toronto Maple Leafs but I was
too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids.'
#219
The Polish Divorce
A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well.
One day he rushed into a lawyer's office
and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him.
The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances,
and asked him the following questions:
Have you any grounds?
Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.
No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.
I don't think you understand.
Does either of you have a real grudge?
No, we have carport, and not need one.
I mean what are your relations like?
All my relations still in Poland .
Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.
Does your wife beat you up?
No, I always up before her.
Is your wife a nagger?
No, she white.
Why do you want this divorce?
She going to kill me.
What makes you think that?
I got proof.
What kind of proof?
She going to poison me.
She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.
I can read English pretty good, and it say:
~~~Polish Remover~~~
A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well.
One day he rushed into a lawyer's office
and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him.
The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances,
and asked him the following questions:
Have you any grounds?
Yes, an acre and half and nice little home.
No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?
It made of concrete.
I don't think you understand.
Does either of you have a real grudge?
No, we have carport, and not need one.
I mean what are your relations like?
All my relations still in Poland .
Is there any infidelity in your marriage?
We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player.
Does your wife beat you up?
No, I always up before her.
Is your wife a nagger?
No, she white.
Why do you want this divorce?
She going to kill me.
What makes you think that?
I got proof.
What kind of proof?
She going to poison me.
She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.
I can read English pretty good, and it say:
~~~Polish Remover~~~
#225
I got this sent by a coworker and it was pretty funny, enjoy!
http://www.thescore.com/buzz/article...ightsaber-duel
http://www.thescore.com/buzz/article...ightsaber-duel