None of my gauges are working, and the AC doesnt work. The miles don't roll over either. Also to turn off the car, I have to hold down the button for 5 seconds. the lights that come up on the dash are, SLIP, VDC Off, and Brake are displayed. Any Ideas?!

Disconnect the battery connectors overnight and see if it resets itself? or you'll probably have to make the dealer fix it...

It seems that I can only rev while in neutral. Therefore when it is in gear I can only drive at idle speed.
What is up with that?

Wow, that's odd. May be an OBD problem. Have you installed anything new(electronically), i.e. bulbs, etc?

nope, nothing new. everything is completely stock on the car. someone mentioned a 'limp' mode? i have to be at work tomorrow, this is going to suck

well now everything is working except the gas gauge and i still cant get over 2k rpms

Sounds like a limp mode, could be wiring issue, loose ecu etc...Better take it to the dealer and have them take a look at it.

now the car wont start! ahh!

CHECK THE FUSES!!!! especially the one for the AUDIO, i know the radio has nothing to do with this but that fuse is used for the whole system including a/c etc

Sounds like a gremlin'd ECU. That thing needs to be taken to the dealer...

Def the ECU. Take it to the dealer

update:

right after they gave me a POS chevy malibu, i stayed in the parking lot thinking of what i should do, i saw the service guy go to my car, even though i told him it wouldnt start, he kept trying to start it (the car turns over but then shuts off), he repeatedly started it and floored it at the same time, making all kinds of smoke come out the back. i was like, WTF i don't even treat my car near that bad, and if anyone was going to be that harsh to my car, it should be me! after i saw that i ran back out to him to let him know i told him it wouldnt start. he was like 'yeah but i got it started for a few seconds' i was like i know you idiot you were flooring it.

but other than that, they called and said they fixed it so it stays on but everything else is screwy still and they told me to come back tomorrow to get an Infiniti rental car (i have no idea why they gave me this chevy, its like the worst car ever made).

the thing that sucks is they said it wont be near ready until later next week, but i am home in dallas for the weekend and have to go back to college sunday

UPDATE: After a week or more in the shop, they said they fixed everything, and when they took it for a drive, the AC Compressor isnt working, so only the fan blows. WTF is wrong with my car!

Damn son, u may have a lemon

Just call the number, they will tow it for free. don't pay for towing.